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Well, here is part two. In part one I talked about some of the social strains in a transgender relationship. Now I will talk about the internal pressures and problems I see in transgender relationships. First let me say that in my friend's long term relationships I see that the two people really love each other and get along for the most part. But there is a higher rate of drama in the relationships than in "regular" relationships. T-Girls seem to love drama and are very emotional. I think this is because of the different stress a T-Girl goes through than a genetic woman would. T-Girls have the constant derision from society to deal with, take hormones that make them crazy and have to constantly try to keep up their appearance. This sometimes makes for low self esteem and a strong need to be accepted for who they are. T-Girls are also very sensitive to criticism and don't take it very well. So, in the normal daily life there is more opportunity for disagreements, jealousy, and general bitchiness in a relationship with a T-Girl.
It is very expensive to be a shemale. Financial pressure is always there. Hormones cost money, surgery is expensive and a T-Girl needs more makeup and lotions and hair remover than genetic girls. T-Girls are also very sensitive to how they dress and the types of clothes they wear. Shemales are very competitive among themselves and can be ruthless to each other about appearance. So the girl may be putting pressure on the guy to help her with some of the expenses and this leads to arguments and fights over money (just like regular couples).
T-Girls are sensitive about commitment from the guy also. Since the couple cannot get married, have children and are denied many of the normal tings of a family life, there is always the worry that the guy might leave them for a real girl so he can have those things not possible in a relationship with a T-Girl. Shemales age like everyone else, and that is also a concern for her. Will the guy still want to be with me when I get older and start losing my looks? Many guys get in a relationship with a T-Girl because of the novelty and many shemales are absolutely stunning in appearance, more so than genetic girls. This attracts guys looking for something different. Then, something just clicks and the couple fall in love and stay together for an extended time, setting up house together. Younger guys are of course more liable to break off the relationship once the glow wears of and the they realize all the hardships involved in being in a relationship with a T-Girl. Many of the T-Girls I know work in some aspect of the sex industry. Some are web cam chat hosts, some are models and one or two strippers. This sometimes leads to jealousy and hurt feelings. This also brings stress to the relationship.
Most of the T-Girls I know in long relationships tend to be with older guys. The guys tend to have good jobs, are divorced once or twice and are pretty conservative. I think they find things in the T-Girl relationship that they could not find in a relationship with a genetic woman. There must be something for these guys to put up with the bullshit from the high strung shemales! Older guys are usually more understanding and tolerant of the eccentricities of the T-Girl and also provide a steadying influence for her. They tend to be there when the girls is emotional and unreasonable, helping her ride out the emotional storm brought on by hormones or other problems. They don't feel they have to understand the problems, just realize that there is a problem. They realize that T-Girls have problems that only T-Girls understand.
I see in these relationships real love and commitment, but the drama is ever present. The couples are always breaking up and getting back together, fighting and arguing, then they are back in love and happy for a while. One of my friends has been with the same guy for over 10 years, and they seem to have worked out how to live together while periodically wanting to kill each other. He ignores the hormone induced bitchiness, learned to say no to some of the more extravagant demands and basically is there for her when she goes through the emotional ups and downs. She has learned to put up with his need to hide the fact that she has a cock, his sometime jealousy and other little things that cause friction in a relationship. Most of my friends in a relationship have found ways to put up with each other. Life with a shemale is sometimes, hard, sometimes exiting and all the time interesting. I think there are many similarities between transgender relationships and regular relationships. There are also many differences, that many guys can not handle. If you guys are looking for a relationship with a T-Girl, make sure you realize the issues involved and don't just get into because of a sexual fantasy. The fantasy fades, and if there is no strong love to keep the couple together, then there is nothing left but misery and conflict.